I got so rattled after hearing Jeff Kent criticize Vin Scully, I had Kent batting ahead of Manny Ramirez in paragraph one and behind him in paragraph two in Sunday's column.
Nice timing, too, on the Page 2 goof. The Times just hired Eddy With a Y as its new publisher, completing an exhaustive search to find someone out there who still reads the newspaper. Obviously, our copy editors in sports don't.
On a bright note, the former DirecTV whiz -- supposedly now our TV Guide into the future although we're a newspaper -- will probably last as long as all the others, The Times going through more publishers than the Dodgers have GMs the last decade.
No getting around it, though, the mistake was still mine, and so while taking the opportunity to apologize for a sloppy column, I thought I'd give Mr. Chuckles a chance to say he was sorry for taking Scully's name in vain.
But he just looked at me -- as if I was asking him to embrace the return of Milton Bradley.
I said a bunch of angry folks had e-mailed, defending Scully while blasting Kent to pieces.
"Folks are upset," I said.
He started dusting off his shoulders as if brushing away dandruff, while saying, "bloggers," spitting out the word like it was some kind of infectious disease. The way things are going in the communications business, incurable might be a better word.
"You wrote it as tongue in cheek, and I said it as tongue in cheek," said Mr. Chuckles, who was greeted by a smattering of boos when he came to the plate -- then turning them into cheers with an RBI double.
"You told me Scully was saying this and that about me hitting third, and I said, 'Vin talks too much,' and he does. But I say that in a respectful way."
I understand. I love savaging Plaschke, but always in a respectful way.
"I said it to you -- because I knew you'd write it tongue in cheek," Kent said. "But as I've said, a lot of people don't get your humor. They take something you write and make it more serious and bigger than it really is.
"People think you and I hate each other," he said, a shock, I must say, to learn we don't. "As you get on me to make adjustments -- you're over the top for some people, too."
I've spent the better part of four years trying to soften the sourpuss and convince folks Kent is not a jerk. Then he takes a poke at Scully.
There's a thin line between sticking one's tongue out and placing tongue in cheek, and the other day it seemed Kent was not only sticking his tongue out, but holding each of his ears as well while talking about Scully.
That's why I cautioned him to retract what he had to say about Scully before I wrote my mistake-filled column -- Kent getting the chance to save both of us.
"You know I'm not going to do that," Kent said, a tough guy on and off the field, the very secret to his success for the last 17 years, he will tell you. "I said it, and I knew you would write it. Vin hasn't been down here in the four years I've been here. It's just a fact.