Everything's Jake with the Sox

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During spring training, Jake Peavy said he wouldn’t try to become a pitcher who relies on guile after surgery robbed him of the power he used to have. Peavy lied, and good for him. He has become as smart as he is good. When he lost the plate in the fourth inning, Peavy managed a bases-loaded situation instead of trying to overpower it.

Sox starters asphyxiated the Cubs this weekend. Peavy, John Danks and Philip Humber combined for 19 innings, 2 earned runs, 11 hits, 14 strikeouts and 5 walks.

Cubs starters Paul Maholm, Ryan Dempster and Jeff Samardzija, meanwhile, combined for 19 1/3 innings, 12 earned runs, 23 hits, 16 strikeouts, 5 walks and 7 homers.

The Cubs might want to expand their spray charts to include Waveland and Sheffield.

Hey, look! The Cubs retired Adam Dunn!

The headline said the Cubs would discuss calling up slugging phenom Anthony Rizzo, and I’m thinking, just as soon as someone calls about Alfonso Soriano.

Actually, Rizzo could serve as the designated hitter during a couple interleague series. If only he could pitch relief. But the good news is, no matter who the Cubs call up, they need help in that spot.

Sunday was the six-year anniversary of Michael Barrett’s slugging A.J. Pierzynski after a collision at the plate. After rerunning the video -- you never miss a chance to rerun the video -- Cubs analyst Bob Brenly noted that the biggest reason Pierzynski (ticks) off opponents is that he’s usually right.

Brenly also suggested that the next time he tries to stretch a single into a double when Gordon Beckham is covering, David DeJesus should get a lead blocker.

And when Brenly and Len Kasper discussed the viscosity of spit vs. saliva, you know they’re deep into Ph.D dissertation on broadcasting a bad season.

Orlando Hudson doesn’t play third in the majors. Brent Morel doesn’t hit in the majors. Yeah, third base is an issue.

Seeing Paul Konerko’s left eye and then hearing he plans to return on Tuesday, well, you just know he was a hockey player at one point.

The Sox lost their cleanup hitter and still put up 16 runs this weekend. The Cubs had their cleanup hitter and scored six. Coming off the bench, Dayan Viciedo went 4-for-11 with a homer and three RBIs. Bryan LaHair went 1-for-9 without driving in a run.

It’s not Maholm’s day when Peavy is allowed to swing away in a bunt situation.

I guess the schedule is the schedule, but I’d have bet the Cubs were going to have Kerry Wood conduct the seventh-inning stretch Sunday.

The Sox swept the Cubs, and I’m wondering, do Sox fans taunt their Cubs friends or pity them?

The sweep marked the Sox’s first series win in a month. The last one came against Seattle. If all you can do is dominate last-place teams, then this is a good time to face Minnesota.
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