Who was right?
"Someone's tone can make or break this kind of experience," Gilleylen says.
The woman who was trying to work needed to understand the other's circumstances, she says. "One woman has to do her work, but maybe the other woman needs to sleep so she can go to work. You never know. Don't think your issues are more important than someone else's."
So, on this one, approach is everything. "If you smile and say, 'Excuse me, I have to do a lot of work, and was hoping to be able to use my laptop. Do you mind not reclining all the way back?', you'll probably have more luck," she says.
How well do you know flying etiquette? Take this quiz, and then see what Gilleylen says on how to handle each situation.
Situation: Grandma and Grandpa are traveling with a baby. Grandma is talking very loudly, and Grandpa is helping to entertain with a blaring Elmo game, much to the dismay of nearby passengers who are trying to sleep. The sleepy passengers should:
A. Yell at Grandma and Grandpa to pipe down.
B. Point out nicely to Grandma and Grandpa that everyone is trying to sleep.
C. Suffer in silence.
Answer: B. "With proud grandparents, you will go far if you address how cute the child is," Gilleylen says. "Once you've had a pleasant interaction, kindly point out that those around you are trying to sleep and ask that they keep the volume down. "
Also, get others involved. "You'd be amazed at how quickly people with a similar goal can rally together," she says.
Situation: The person sitting next to you sneezes continuously in your face and doesn't cover his nose. You should …
A. Give him a tissue.
B. Sneeze back on him.
C. Speak up.
Answer: C. "When this happens, I make a gesture and say, 'Let me wash my hands or clear the air,' " Gilleylen says. "That might make them be more mindful for the next sneeze."
Situation: The plane is late, and there are lots of people who are sweating out making a connection. The connecting passengers should: