Wise up to these dumb fashion trends

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Laugh-out-loud platform shoes



You can't walk in them, these stepladders for your feet. "They're for beauty queens and drag queens," says Susan Swimmer, fashion features editor for More magazine. True: They make your legs look longer. False: They're pretty or even remotely practical. More appealing footwear trends to continue in the new decade are flat riding boots and ballet flats, plain or embellished, in leather, suede, metallics and animal prints.



Ferocious fashion



Aggressive shoulders might seem right for these tough times, but save them for Rihanna or dress-up on Halloween. "It's really about evolution, not revolution!" says Gregg Andrews, a Nordstrom fashion director who sees feminine (not girly or sexy) styles predominating in the coming months. Dresses, of a less superhero variety, create winning silhouettes that will continue into spring and beyond. They're recession friendly, an instant outfit and a no-brainer.



Boyfriend dressing



An excuse for oversize clothes that flatter no one (not even the boyfriend). Baggy cardigans, giant button-down shirts, huge blazers, rolled-up blue jeans, unisex lace-up shoes. "It's very tricky to wear without looking theatrical," says Swimmer. Stick to the women's department, where power suiting has undergone a much needed makeover with lots of jacket, skirt and trouser options that have nothing to do with dressing like a man.



Fashion faves worth keeping



Hats on men and women, especially fedoras

Vintage and vintage-inspired classics

Cardigans Michelle Obama has the right idea.

Wide belts They work magic for those with a waist — or who wish they had one.

Designer-for-less For example, Vera Wang at Kohl's, Norma Kamali for Walmart and Jimmy Choo at H&M.

Plus sizes with style

Way beyond tents and muumuus.



More bad ideas to kick to the curb



"It" logo and wait-list purses that cost a month's rent (and more) "Cloying and cliched," says Christene Barberich, editorial director of the style and shopping blog refinery29.com.

Clunky footwear Crocs and Uggs. Crocs are cute on toddlers and good for gardening. Period. Cozy Uggs work for apres ski or surfing, but they're no match for rain and slush.

Neon Nobody looks good in putrid '80s retread colors.

Skintight anything, especially skinny jeans.

Tattoos Listen to your mother.
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